Impoverished from the combined "Collective" effects of Injustice, Immorality and Godlessness, I had to go for a long walk last night to meet my Health Requirements that are continually FAILED by this System almost Intentionally it seems. The joys of being MURDERED by your Own Family Member's Greed and Governmental Corruption.
Once again, on this walk I could see as clear as day that it is not just my home (house) that is being destroyed, it is my entire home area. The entire area that I grew up in and call home is being completely destroyed by foreigners and a brainwashed hopeless youth. It is completely demoralizing for me.
The government can keep pumping it's message and people will keep believing it.
There was a point to attempting to create this post. It had to do with "Race".
Racial Matters. I don't care whatever lies people are told. Race makes a difference. Biology Matters. I have mixed views and they are not stable. If I consciously become "racist", I meet people and I see reasons not to be "racist". If disavow "racism", life suddenly throws me valid reasons why that is completely wrong and moronic too.
Anyways, regardless of anyone's biological make up, we all see race. That is unless we lie to ourselves to go along with a perceived popular opinion. What is popular is not always right, what is right is not always popular. In truth, what I have found in life is that most people are far more 'racist' than I am. They are just not open about it.
Calling someone a dumb fucking nigger. I am not exactly right to do that.
I was thinking just last night that most blacks that I meet in Canada, most of them appear to be trying to the best of their ability. Trying to be good upstanding contributing people that is. Should we really be all mixed up together? I don't know, that's a question for another day. Personally I crave the demographics of the past.
Hidden Asian Aggression.
I made reference to this yesterday too. 'Doctor' Ansun Koo is Asian. "We can help you, but we don't want to" he said with a smile. I remembered last night that three Asian women acted completely counter to the white woman who had felt immense sympathy for me. The Asians went against what was morally right in my case in February of 2016, partaking in the RAILROADING of my person right into my Death. Giggling away at their success in Court.
Indian Affairs
I have learned to appreciate (East) Indians more and more. Like everyone, there is good and bad I guess, but they are one group of peoples that I probably never gave enough credit to in years gone by. If I recall some prior doctor's visits, I was probably wrong not give them a chance at my family affairs. From my experiences, Indian's seem to have solid grasp on family. At least many of them that I meet do. Lots of good wholesome appropriate girls too. Of course, I have also been a victim of their racism as well, so it's just perspective.
White Snowflakes
I cannot say people such as Lori Ashton are perfect. She is dirty criminal in my eyes. Many 'white' people are. Corrupted morals. Repugnant conduct. I cannot say good things about the conduct of my oldest brother, nor my sister. I cannot say good things about many white people. However, on the other hand.. if this was still a relatively homogeneous white society I tend to wonder if so many people would have degraded to such low levels. The demographics of forty years ago would be much more constructive to meeting my needs and solving this situation.
Anyways, this post is a misfire. I am simply too worn out this morning. I am now burdened by problems brought about by poverty. Rather than focusing my work life, I am focusing on the problems that I need to deal with in regards to this system and in steering onto that corrupt pile of stinking garbage, everything else in my life collapses. I shouldn't even be alive. There has been so much unjust damage brought to my life. All my reasons for existing are destroyed, broken, or stolen. I go for a walk and all I see is the destruction of the external community as well.
"The Garden of Eden".
This was a great place to live. It was Heaven just as it was originally constructed, but now it is being turned into a disgusting cess pit of hell. The density and high rises are disgusting. The entire ambience feels evil, without morals, without peace, without anything beneficial to anyone. Everywhere I walked last night, I could see nothing but the cheating of mankind out of what was healthy and appropriate for a wholesome existence on this Earth. I was once again asking myself: "Why would I even want to live any longer?"
People destroy my life, my home, my personal relationships, my finances, my sex life, my ability to breed a future, and on and on and on... then on a community level, I go for a walk and I see everything I have always loved be destroyed by a bunch of sick, lost, clueless, self-centred, greedy people. Of course with such, I cannot find the proper non-damaging support that I need to at least attempt to better the world before I finally terminate in existence. I have a $1.20 to my name at the moment, and I definitely have the wrong energy to change that.
In talking to someone from Public Safety last night, an undisclosed government employee, she has her frustrations too. It's just impossible it seems. What I need is so simple. It just seems to pass over everyone's heads. I do not need lobbyists, politicians, etc. I do not need the complications of anyone who is only going to drain me further. Where ever there is a need to explain things to others for an understanding I will not find what I need. I get drained trying to bring others up to speed, who in reality - just walk away after finding themselves entertained.
Which is a primary reason for this website. Write it ONCE. The best thing I could do for myself and the world is to forensically write my own history with the 'system' as accurately as possible. To do that I need absolute undistracted stability. In essence, I just need food, coffee, cigarettes, peace and whatever files that I wish without any hindrance. The way I look at it, there is no point in even trying to engage such a process without some kind of personal guarantee that those needs can be met. Otherwise I just fall into a tail spin like I am in now.
Of course, as already stated in the process just mentioned, I could easily build a working demo of what is actually needed by those who want to be better the World and make it a better place. A demo using the existing structures already in existence with no actual hard changes. Truthfully, no real government changes are really needed. Nothing absolutely demanding government action to bring the idea to fruition and populate the seed everywhere for everyone to embrace and empower themselves with is needed. I wish I could write this properly.
If I could have myself of 15 or 25 years ago, if I could have a second me, I could probably do everything I need to do all on my own. It is so simple. Such a simple concept. "Fixing" the System for every single person alive that is.