Someone messaged me the other day saying "So the Struggle is Real...". You all see my posts, maybe many of you blocked them because of the election opinions flying out of me. Close to ten people dropped me during that time and well, bye bye. Anyways, posting here has kept me SANE. I can't even begin to explain the Challenges of having your life completely imploded losing your credit, savings, livelihood, health, relationships, and everything you imagine disintegrate completely out of your control. Once I am down, I will not get up. This week alone... Ask the RCMP Officers who spoke with me. I'm sure they considered running me to the hospital. That would have been the fifth time and I am glad they didnt. The floor fell out on me this week as someone gave their word and the pulled it. When you're literally hanging on by a thread... you build your life on people's words. You have no choice. Everything imploded, including next week's job and the ability to take one this past week. As everything progressed I could barely even process. My mind just... Keep positive and keep moving forward, suddenly a stroke of luck. The job came through as they are good godly people, they understood, with that stress gone I was able to find a place. Done deal. Flirty single homeowner who's my age. Everyone deserves help as shes asking what sign I am and revealing body parts. We make a deal. We sign, I pay... then just tonight she texts me and says I can until the 15th, which is ten days to Christmas. She doesn't think.its a big deal to.change a signed contract. Not worth arguing over. I wanted to throw up an hour ago. I can only keep going through this constant cycle so long. I am so burned out from it. I testified I'm Court a few weeks ago that if the Probation Office and my experiences there were the only source of help I could recieve that I'd kill myself. Guess what? I'm out of chips in this game. They are now the only help. I just hope I am not too sick to keep working next week. I could price better, too high at times, too low at others as I scramble... But the biggest failures came when I had to place my trust in another human being. People do not know how to keep their word. INTEGRITY (not that I am perfect by any means)